Saturday, March 2, 2013

I Really Do Not Want To Believe This Story

Because if it is true,there really are people so stupid that they probably need instructions  every few seconds: inhale, exhale.  From March 1, 2013 Hit and Run:
A Maryland kid chewed his breakfast pastry into the shape of a gun at school and wound up with two days suspension. The pastry in question was not named, but it's gotta be a Pop-Tart, right?
The kid claims he was actually trying to chew it in the shape of a mountain, but the teacher decided it looked too much like a gun.  Let's give the teacher The benefit of the doubt: what if the kid actually was chewing his pastry into the shape of the dreaded AR 15? Did the teacher think this kid was about to open fire, squirting strawberry filling all over the rest of the students?


  1. Far, far more violent than a loaded Pop Tart are some of the lyrics from some of the popular songs.

    What about this oldie from the Beatles:

    "Joan was quizzical, studied metaphysical
    Science in the home
    Late nights all alone with a test-tube
    Maxwell Edison majoring in medicine
    Calls her on the phone
    "Can I take you out to the pictures
    But as she's getting ready to go
    A knock comes on the door...

    Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer
    Came down upon her head
    Bang, bang, Maxwell's silver hammer
    Made sure that she was dead."

    And that's just the first verse!

    And speaking of Maxwell's Silver Hammer, the Superintendent of the Anne Arundel County Public School system, on whose watch this asinine disciplinary action is occurring, is Kevin M. Maxwell, Ph.D.

    Maxwell's Silver Hammer indeed!

    According to the Anne Arundel County Public Schools website, Dr. Maxwell's e-mail address is .

    And, while we're providing e-mail addresses, the members of the Anne Arundel County Board of Education also have e-mail addresses:;;;;;;;;;

    Sandy Blondell, the Principal of Park Elementary School, has apparently taken pains to not publicize her own e-mail address, but I would suggest the possibility that hers is .

  2. So. . .
    Dr. Maxwell's silver hammer of professional authority came down on the head of this ordinary normal boy?

    I think the only appropriate response is gales of derisive laughter in the Principal's face, and before witnesses. A pastry gun! With other children punching and poking and pulling hair without the benefit of precursor crimes such as possession of un permitted and unregistered pastry guns, they're worried about the sequence of bites on the tooth-rotting pastry the school serves their charges.