Sunday, April 12, 2020

Humor for Sad Times

Quarantine Diary

Self-Isolation Quarantine Diary:

Day 1 – I Can Do This!!  Got enough food and wine to last a month!

Day 2 – Opening my 8th bottle of Wine.  I fear wine supplies might not last!

Day 3 – Strawberries:  Some have 210 seeds, some have 235 seeds.  Who Knew??

Day 4 – 8:00pm.  Removed my Day Pajamas and put on my Night Pajamas.

Day 5 – Today, I tried to make Hand Sanitizer.  It came out as Jello Shots!!

Day 6 – I get to take the Garbage out.  I’m So excited, I can’t decide what to wear.

Day 7 – Laughing way too much at my own jokes!!

Day 8 – Went to a new restaurant called “The Kitchen” You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal.  I have no clue how this place is still in business.

Day 9 – I put liquor bottles in every room.  Tonight, I’m getting all dressed up and going bar hopping.

Day 10 – Struck up a conversation with a spider today.  Seems nice.  He’s a web designer.

Day 11 – Isolation is hard.  I swear my fridge just said, “What the hell do you want now?”

Day 12 – I realized why dogs get so excited about something moving outside, going for walks or car rides.  I think I just barked at a squirrel.

Day 13 – If you keep a glass of wine in each hand, you can’t accidentally touch your face.

Day 14 – Watched the birds fight over a worm.  The Cardinals lead the Blue Jays 3–1.

Day 15 – Anybody else feel like they’ve cooked dinner about 395 times this month?

2 comments:

  1. You know you want a $500 luxury designer face mask.


    I'll just show myself out.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I weighted myself after close to a month of this: I have actually lost five pounds. No exercise other than one trip a week to the store and taking the trash out. The only reason is I am not eating as much because I know I can't just run to the store for munchies.

    ReplyDelete