"What Do You Mean, I'm Too Drunk to Drive?"

3/8/16 Smoking Gun:

MARCH 8--Meet Maryann Christy.
The Illinois woman, 54, is facing a drunk driving charge after allegedly plowing her car into a tree and then continuing to drive with the 15-foot accessory embedded in the vehicle's grille.

Christy was nabbed in late-January after a Roselle Police Department officer spotted her driving with the tree as a hood ornament. Investigators estimated that Christy drove several miles before getting pulled over.

Christy, who was navigating with the 2004 Lincoln’s air bags deployed, told the cop that she recalled hitting a tree, but could not remember where the 11 PM collision occurred. Christy, who was arrested a few miles from her home in Schaumburg, works as a marketing consultant, according to her LinkedIn profile.