It takes quite a bit longer to download now, because it is considerably more "active."
I appreciate all your suggestions and assistance on this. I am hoping that suggestions and corrections from this will get us to point where we can put this up on Kickstarter.
UPDATE: I may have gotten a little too ambitious on this. This is perhaps too large of a project to tackle by myself.
Very interesting! The images and narrative drew me in and encouraged me to listen.
ReplyDeleteThe zooming and panning is distracting, perhaps it could move a bit slower, and only in one direction per image. Some images may dissolve into each other. The panning shots typically dissolve into opposing panning shots. It may seem important from the historian's point of view to pan across each image entirely, but the viewer cannot process the information that rapidly. It is more important for the viewer to feel history as a progression comfortably.
When images of particular people are shown, they should always be linked to the exact stating of their name and relevance, and there should be a very slight zoom (no pan), barely noticable. You'll notice this effect in almost all documentaries, and even fictional movies where a character is waxing about a legend or family member from the past.
The image of the slave with the evicerated back may be a bit too much for your average viewer.
Some images are on too briefly for the viewer to register. For the velocity of images (or cadence) to change, it has to be done purposefully. Often there is a change, for example when you say "But there were, men and women, who were prepared.." This is a change in your vocal delivery that could tie to a series of changes in the visual frames. The images of Frederick Douglass and others could have names superimposed perhaps.
Very well structured; it outlines the issue well and leads into the specific topic with good execution.
ReplyDeleteThe zooming and panning is distracting, perhaps it could move a bit slower, and only in one direction per image. Some images may dissolve into each other. The panning shots typically dissolve into opposing panning shots. It may seem important from the historian's point of view to pan across each image entirely, but the viewer cannot process the information that rapidly. It is more important for the viewer to feel history as a progression comfortably.
When images of particular people are shown, they should always be linked to the exact stating of their name and relevance, and there should be a very slight zoom (no pan), barely noticable. You'll notice this effect in almost all documentaries, and even fictional movies where a character is waxing about a legend or family member from the past.
The image of the slave with the evicerated back may be a bit too much for your average viewer.
Some images are on too briefly for the viewer to register. For the velocity of images (or cadence) to change, it has to be done purposefully. Often there is a change, for example when you say "But there were, men and women, who were prepared.." This is a change in your vocal delivery that could tie to a series of changes in the visual frames. The images of Frederick Douglass and others could have names superimposed perhaps.
I read Jeff's comments as I watched the video. Until I read his assessment of the panning, it didn't bother me, but as I thought about it, I think I tend to agree. I think there is more movement than is warranted. I think back to Ken Burns' 'The Civil War' series. It appeared to me that he used a lot of panning and zooming to interject action into still pictures. While adding movement to your pictures would be valuable, I think the story, so far, doesn't support it. I think at this point, it is an introduction more than a story.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I do think it is an improvement to the earlier version (but I think I prefer your wife's voice! :-) ).
It sounds like a great project and hope it gets the support it deserves. The teaser is pretty good and makes me want to learn more about it.
Good luck!
My son, who just finished his degree in video production, had the same criticism of the panning problem as Jeff, and now that I look at it is glaringly obvious!
ReplyDeleteJeff is one of my very capable students from Western Civilization this last semester.
A Definite improvement. The panning having already been beaten into the ground, I'd suggest maybe less general background in the narration and more specific to the case, since that's what the film is to be about.
ReplyDeleteYou can also spend a little time with an audio editor (Like Audacity) to flatten out some of the inevitable mouth noises one gets before speaking.
The background music was at a good level.