Kate Bolick has written a very long, very sad article, "All the Single Ladies" in the November 2011 The Atlantic. It is partly a tragic retrospective on the decision she made eleven years ago, when she was 28, to break up with a guy that she clearly realizes that she should have married, and why. (She doesn't blame her mother's militant feminism, but you would have to be a fool not to see that this is the major cause.)
It is also an interesting analysis of how changing social structure has created the absurd situation where a lot of women cannot get married, especially in some cultures, such as middle class blacks, and on college campuses, women looking for commitment have fallen into a hopeless situation where the "hook-up" culture takes any incentive for many men to make any commitment.
I guess what strikes me as most sad is that the intellectuals, in their contemptuous shedding of traditional Christian-based values, have created a situation that is not making them happy--but they won't admit that their brave new world has failed them.
All I have to say to women is you reap what you sow. Every article is about how much better women are than men these days and every one ends with "why can't I find a husband?" Most of my male friends are happy to not grow up, get laid, get high, drink, no responsibilities, and these special enlightened girls are begging them to settle down. I just can't feel any sympathy for them.
ReplyDeleteWhile I didn't read the whole article (it was very long and covered a lot of ground I'm already familiar with) I never got the impression she was or is dedicated to getting married and didn't she say something to the effect she was ambivalent at best about having kids?
ReplyDeleteIf so, as someone in the comments noted, there's a word for people like her: spinsters.
At work I hear enough from men my age who are going through, or have been through Divorce. It makes me grateful for my extended Bachelorhood. Only I don't get any of that hook-up stuff at my age. The women I fancy would have nothing to do with me, and the women who'd have anything to do with me should be avoided at all costs.
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